"there was no way of lessening the pain without also ruining what I admired most about you" read this at work and got up and went home because I needed to lie down.
I'm ex-FABRIC. I've met the girl in your essay too many times. I guess in rejecting a mortal life she became something less than God and something less than Human. I always thought something was off about her, but when we met I hated myself so much that I wouldn't let myself hate something with an IMO gold medal, an MIT acceptance or any of the other status symbols the space valued that I lacked- I wouldn't let myself hate something ranked above me. Well, I snapped out of that and I definitely don't miss her, I can't stand her, I'm repulsed by her.
And yes, I do realize I've been saying she (sing) instead of they (plur). Probably best that I keep it that way. All of them look, sound and act the same.
P.S: Scrolled down and was surprised to find out the girl in your essay was meant to be male. Wow, at least to me the other person had to be a girl. But hey, many "the other person"-s I met were put off by me because of an Atalanta complex, so do with my perception of gender what you will.
I thought this was nonfiction until "the totals for the current week were: work, 80h; sleep, 50h; social, 10h; meditation and journaling; 8h; gym, 7h; chores and maintenance, 7h; commute, 6h"
anyhow i recently saw this video on youtube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Z3RcXlNaMw) and in some way it was almost like the complete opposite of this one. or... well, two sides of the same coin. in the video, an eternal child fails to commit to anything because doing real work and cutting off branches of possibilities is too scary. they would do anything to keep themselves "exceptional," even if it's only in potential. here, she, possibly an eternal child, commits immediately to one thing and rejects every other possibility, because committing allows them to be "exceptional," even if the definition of exceptionality could be entirely wrong.
Didn't realize until I saw the note saying it was fiction at the end
oh wait this is fiction wtf
"there was no way of lessening the pain without also ruining what I admired most about you" read this at work and got up and went home because I needed to lie down.
read this again and it hit even harder than the first time, love the evocative descriptions of the environment <3
“i’d always struggled with finding anything in between adoration and indifference” made me question my whole life
fav thing to read on the internet :)
The fiction note hit hard. Devotion to the purpose vs. devotion to existing life is a theme I’ll forever love and this beautifully captured it
wow so immersive!! i love it so much
wow I love this so much
omg first time writing fiction :o
hooray!!! you did it! you posted the thing!! i'm v proud
fastest i ever clicked on a subscribed blog post lmaoooo
I’m convinced you’re the girl and the narrator is your own thoughts abt yourself?
is never stated but i wrote this assuming the narrator was a girl and the other person was a guy
I'm ex-FABRIC. I've met the girl in your essay too many times. I guess in rejecting a mortal life she became something less than God and something less than Human. I always thought something was off about her, but when we met I hated myself so much that I wouldn't let myself hate something with an IMO gold medal, an MIT acceptance or any of the other status symbols the space valued that I lacked- I wouldn't let myself hate something ranked above me. Well, I snapped out of that and I definitely don't miss her, I can't stand her, I'm repulsed by her.
And yes, I do realize I've been saying she (sing) instead of they (plur). Probably best that I keep it that way. All of them look, sound and act the same.
P.S: Scrolled down and was surprised to find out the girl in your essay was meant to be male. Wow, at least to me the other person had to be a girl. But hey, many "the other person"-s I met were put off by me because of an Atalanta complex, so do with my perception of gender what you will.
I thought this was nonfiction until "the totals for the current week were: work, 80h; sleep, 50h; social, 10h; meditation and journaling; 8h; gym, 7h; chores and maintenance, 7h; commute, 6h"
that part is actually somewhat realistic! (these people exist)
People in relationships?
hits hard.
anyhow i recently saw this video on youtube (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Z3RcXlNaMw) and in some way it was almost like the complete opposite of this one. or... well, two sides of the same coin. in the video, an eternal child fails to commit to anything because doing real work and cutting off branches of possibilities is too scary. they would do anything to keep themselves "exceptional," even if it's only in potential. here, she, possibly an eternal child, commits immediately to one thing and rejects every other possibility, because committing allows them to be "exceptional," even if the definition of exceptionality could be entirely wrong.
yep i agree failing to commit is a big failure mode!